God: foundation to a life-long marriage.

What's the secret behind a life-long marriage? Love, trust, communication, honor...the list goes on but at the top of the list should be God. Growing up in a southern baptist church, the same church my daddy was raised in didn't seem like an important issue when I was a teenager but now that I'm a mom and wife, my mindset has changed. 

Let me start by saying that I am a Christian and I'm proud of that but I don't go to church like I should and now that I have a daughter, I feel it's more important for me to start back now more than ever...not only because in this crazy world that we live in I feel she needs to believe in a higher good and be rooted in her faith so she can face this world as an adult but for her parents marriage. 

That old saying "behind every good man is a good woman" may be true but "behind every great marriage is The Lord" is an ever truer statement. My parents were high school sweethearts with a marriage right after graduation and then babies a couple years later, just living a happy simple life...sounds like something from a country song or hallmark movie right? Well it's not too good to be true. It is real, and rooted at the base of their fairy tale is their faith in God. He is the foundation in which their marriage is placed and it must be a wonderful thing because they're going on 27 years! 

When I was at the point in my life where marriage started coming into the picture, my inspiration was close to home...my parents. I wanted a love and marriage like theirs. Okay, so they don't always see eye to eye and don't always juggle the stress or work, children and "in laws" the greatest but theyre human!!! I have to admit, never would I have guessed that my parents would be my marriage mentor but they are...

Growing up, I was fortunate to have both parents in our household and they showed us everyday how you're supposed to treat the one you love. My daddy was an amazing provider for my momma and us and I remember when he came home, he always kissed her upon entering the kitchen. And my mom worships my daddy...she's always going on and on about how sexy he is and how she loves him!!! Get a room. But now that I'm an adult, I know their secret...marriage rooted in The Lord.

Without having a biblical based marriage, their trying times would have been a lot worse and having faith in God has been the reason they have made it 25+ years. Yes, they love each other unconditionally, trust each other whole heartedly, honor each other and provide for each other but God provided the platform in which all those traits were born. 

So as Michael and I enter our 3rd year or wedded bliss, I hope we inherit some of those God filled secrets with us on our journey to happily ever after. I want our daughter to look at us one day and see what it truly means to be happily married and God fearing. Then maybe, thru our communication and expression, she will see the real "foundation" to marriage the same way I learned...by watching my parents and seeing the love they had for one another and God. 

I love you momma and daddy! 

Date Night to Dirty Diapers

Recently, I find my husband and I have fallen into a "parenting" routine. First, don't get me wrong... I wouldn't have it any other way because spending all the time we can with our princess is precious time that we cherish. BUT...I'm also an honest person and I love my daughter more than life itself but I love my husband too and we don't set aside "quality" time for us. Every older person I know keeps telling us to set aside a few nights a month and go on a date to dinner or a movie or whatever and we really haven't done it yet!!! We will get ready, drop Fraser off at my parents or with my MIL and we will get to the restaurant...and then it hits!!!! We both miss Fraser and so we eat our food and head back home to get her. I knew it'd be hard to leave her with her grandparents but I never guessed it'd be like this. 

  So, after doing some mini self reflection, I've decided to let Fraser spend the night with her grandparents for the first time, I'm scared ill chicken out but were going to try so WE can have a mommy/daddy date and spend some much needed couple time together. I love my husband more than anything, he's such a wonderful provider for Fraser and me and he's an amazing dad but between him working all day and me staying home with Fraser all day, cleaning, a bulldog and yard work...we're too tired on the weekends to even think about a night out. Being a parent is the best thing that's ever happened to us but I don't want to look back in 25 years and all we have in common is being "really good" parents. I want that fire that's blazing inside us now to still be roaring when our baby is grown! 

  

So, I promised Michael that I would try everyday to let him know he's still SEXY and even though I love him as a husband, I will love and see him as my MAN!! Wish us luck with letting Fraser spend the night away from home, and to all you young parents out there...start dating again now so you'll be the cutest couple when you're grandparents one day! Who knew that dating after marriage could be more exciting than when you are a googly-eyed 20 year old!!

Happy Dating Parents!!!!

Having a boyfriend and a husband?

I recently read a blog about a man who was dating a woman and he was married...he's a brave soul dealing with 2 women! As I read the blog, I became more interested in his relationships and I also became very intrigued. So...here's my confession! I am married but I also have a boyfriend. 

  He's a truly amazing man. He's smart, handsome, makes me laugh and when he smiles at me...the world goes away for a split second. Yes, I know I'm married. But this guy surprises me all the time, he takes me to dinner, the movies, shopping and to my favorite place...Target! I know, I know I'm married but I can't help it...this guy is the best thing that's happened to me :) he's also wonderful with my daughter too, she loves him and he can always make her smile too! Oh yea, did I mention that my boyfriend IS my husband!!! 

  Just because we got married 3 years ago, doesn't mean our fun, spontaneous, dating life should die. When we go to dinner or just riding in the car...we laugh non stop and that spark is lit all over again! We still hold hand while we watch TV at night and when we go to the movies...it's like we're dating all over again with sharing a drink and popcorn and snuggling up as close as we can without being labeled as PDA! 

  I know that 3 years of marriage doesn't seem like a long time to some people but in today's world, 3 years in a lifetime. I have so many friends that are already divorced, separated or just aren't happy in their marriage. So Michael and I made a promise to each other that we'd never let our dating life end. We try to do something everyday to keep the fire fueled!! And even after 3 years of marriage, a house, bills and a beautiful little girl later...the fire is still blazing out of control! 
  
  I thank God everyday that he placed both my boyfriend and my husband in my life because without Michael, I'd be lost. I can't imagine life with anyone else or for my sweet princess, Fraser to have a different daddy because Michael was made for that little girl and she was made for him. So, as I add more wonderful years to my marriage, I plan to equally add those same years to my life with my boyfriend, I love you William Michael!!!! 

Hand holding...are you one of those couples?

So, my husband and I were in the car driving to Target over the weekend and he slid his hand over with the intention of holding my hand as we drove down the road. Like I always do, I wrapped my hand around his index finger and gave him a smile. In the past , when he's tried to hold my hand, I do this small ninja move to only hold his finger. Somebody asked me one time...why do you only hold a finger and not the whole hand? I got to thinking about it and all these questions started running thru my head. Is it habit? Am I not a hand holding kind a girl? Is this my way of maintaining my personal space? So I done some mini soul searching and came to the conclusion...the answer is none of the above! I thought about all my previous boyfriends and I held their whole hand anytime it was attempted so what changed with my husband? We started dating 5 years ago and shortly after we started dating, I began my whole " only hold his finger" behavior and I never paid any attention that it became my routine for riding in the car, watching TV or whatever. So let me try to explain why I do this...I have never loved a man the way I love my husband, he makes me fall in love with him on a daily basis and every time I look into his eyes, I know there's only me in there :) (things like that make a girl giddy) I have never trusted anybody the way I trust him. I know without a doubt that I can trust him with my everything and have no reason not to. I know he's in this for the long haul, until death do us part, and if he's late from work I have zero worries bc I know he just got tied up walking out the door from his plant. Our precious baby girl and me are his whole world and he'd never do anything to risk losing us. It also makes me feel blessed and grateful that my daughter will grow up watching her daddy and how he treats me...and she will know how a man is supposed to treat a lady! So...why do I only hold his finger instead of his hand? Well, it's simple...I don't have to have his entire hand to know he's mine or to know he's not going anywhere...just holding his one finger is all that I need :) some people may think its lame or whatever but oh well, everybody has an opinion. So, if you're one of those whole hand girls, don't take my blog as you're not as secure in your relationship bc that's not what it was intended for...but for those who know me and how I think and show emotion...you will understand because for me to feel like thus from the start of my relationship with my husband is a small revelation for this girl! I searched thru a whole bunch of bad bananas to find that one perfect one...you know the super sweet, kinda soft...kinda firm banana that makes a banana split out of this world amazing!!! Well that's my hubby, love you bugaboo :)

Tag! You're it...Super mommy.

I was tagged by a fellow mommy friend to do this blog so here we go...It's a bird, It's a plane, NO...it's Captain Super Mommy!

1. How many kids do you have?

I have one beautiful daughter, Miss Fraser, who will be 5M on January 16th.

2. Do you feel like you have it all together everyday? (cleaning, laundry, baby etc...)

For the most part, yea :) now...to be clear, my house isn't as spotless as I'd like daily and I may not get every piece of clothing washed, dried and put up but come on...I've got a baby and a bulldog! But...my house is clean, nobody wears dirty clothes and my baby is chunky and happy (so is the bulldog) so I'm doing pretty good.

3. When do make time to shower?

Whenever Fraser is asleep or her daddy is home :) I never knew I could wash all of me so fast until my little girl was born! 

4. Do you wear make up daily?

Haha!! Are you kidding! I'm lucky if my socks match! The days that Fraser is being almost perfect, I do my make up but mostly I don't bother...my husband watched me give birth...seeing me without make up will never scare him!

5. Do you style your hair everyday?

Refer to my previous answer :) JK! I do manage to dry and straighten my hair almost everyday...but The Lord blessed me with wavy hair so if I let it ride...I'm safe!

6. When do you do your hair/make up?

Whenever Fraser is sleeping or content with watching me :) 

7. Do you workout? And when...

Umm, keeping up with a hyper bulldog and baby is plenty of exercise!! I'm going to make time to start walking/jogging when the weather warms up enough for Fraser! 

8. What's your cleaning schedule? Do you clean daily?

Yes I clean daily...did I mention the bulldog and baby? And let's not forget the hubby! I clean most when Fraser's down for a long nap or in the evening when Michael is home.

9. Do you get overwhelmed with all the responsibilities of a mommy?

Not yet, I have had my moments when I needed to count backwards from 5 to calm myself like they do on Peg+Cat(how awful that I make ETV references)but I haven't reached my breaking point...but I was also blessed with a wonderful behaved baby and supporting/helpful family! 

10. How often do you have alone time/me time to relax?

Toilet! JK...I take a hot bubble bath at night and read after Fraser goes to bed and sometimes, there's a glass of wine (syke!) a can of diet coke to accompany that bath! After I become super waterlogged...I spend some QT time with my sexy man before bed! 

So, there you have it...all the Super Mommy powers :) Diet Coke, Bubble Baths and 50 Shades of Gray!! And in the spirit of super heros...super mom! super mom! Does all the things a super mom can! ( to the rhythm of Spider-Man) 

Tag! You're it...Mommy Life

1. Are you a SAHM or working mom?
I'm a stay at home mom.

2. Would you have it any other way?
NO! I love being able and blessed to stay home with my princess. It makes me thankful my husband is such a great provider. 

3. Do you co-sleep?
Fraser sleeps in her pack-n-play beside our bed...this mommy isn't quite ready to move her into her crib yet

4. One must have gear for baby?
Her cradle swing! She loves it for watching mommy, napping and playing with her feet :)

5. How many kids do you plan to have?
We always said 2...but now that Fraser is here, we feel 110% happy and content with just her! That may change a few years from now but right now, we're enjoying miss Frazzle D.

6. Date night? How many per month?
We try to go on a date (day/night) at least once every 2 weeks! We always have fun but we miss our sweet girl!

7. What's your child's favorite tv show?
Well, she's a baby but she loves the sounds and colors on the Dinosaur Train and Cat in the Hat.

8. What did you buy before baby and never used?
I have 2: wipe warmer(biggest waste) and a cradle bc she wouldn't sleep in it.

9. What's your kids favorite food?
We're on stage 1 baby foods and we haven't found one yet that she doesn't like! 

10. How many cars does your family have?
We own 2 cars. I drive a Camry and my husband has a Lincoln LS (no! It's not a granny Lincoln) 

11. Weight gain before, during and after pregnancy?
I lost about 10lbs before pregnancy, I gained about 25lbs during my pregger stage and I've lost it all but about 5-8 lbs.

12. Dream vacation with your kids?
Disney World for sure!!! I'm so ready to see Fraser's face when she sees that place :) 

13. Dream vacation without the kids?
Scotland!! We want to take 2nd honeymoon there so bad...we're going one day!

14. How has your life changed since your baby was born?
How hadn't my life changed??? Everything has changed..where we go, who we hang out with, how we talk and we've became so much happier just watching her grow and learn'

15. Finish the sentence..."It makes my heart melt to see..." 
Fraser with her daddy! She is def. a daddy's girl and he's the greatest daddy on earth! Watching him with her is truly amazing and I never thought he could get sexier...until now!

16. Where do you shop for your kids?
Everywhere!!! Target, Crazy 8, Gymboree, The Children's Place and a lot of online stores...

17. Favorite make-up and skin care products?
Reckon make up and Burt's Bees skin care 

18. Huggins diaper jeans? Yay or nay? 
No comment!! Ever !!

19. Have you always wanted kids?
Kinda but not as much until I met Michael!

20. Best part about being a mom?
Umm, everything...even poopy diapers! My little girl is my whole heart and I love being not just being a mother but being HER mommy... Watching her grow, seeing her smile, laughing at her laugh! I love it all!  

From Zero sister-in-laws to 2

I married my husband in 2011, he had 2 brothers at the time and I hoped one day to have sister in laws that I could become close to since I was the only girl with two brothers...well time passed and I began to realize that I would be 35 before that happened! That was my mind set at the beginning of 2013...and by December 31st of last year, I had gained 2 sister-in- laws in less than 30 days :) YEA... I said less than 30 days! The first was a cute, petite thing named Kim! She married my husbands oldest brother Dec 7th. They had a cute, close family wedding in NC and I got to meet her family and their 2 sweet children...and if anybody knows my husbands oldest brother, kids and a wife was a big shock to his mom and my husband but when we were up there for the wedding, I became amazed at the love he had for those kids and for the first time I thought "he's a daddy" :) my brother-in- law and his new wife, Kim are such a cute little couple(well family) and they make each other laugh constantly, So I thought...YAY! I have another girl finally. Now fast forward 3 weeks and BAM! I gained another sister-in-law, Julie or more commonly know as Ju Ju!! I knew Julie for a few years as a friend of my husbands cousin but never in 1million years would I have guessed she would marry my husbands brother!!! Well, that's the fun part about life, it throws all kinds of curve balls! Julie and Chris were married December 28th in a historic home right here in SC! They had a very pretty, very low keyed ceremony and reception...my favorite part other than those two getting hitched was watching my super sexy husband standing up there all distinguished in his tux!! Now, keep in mind that I've gained 2 girls in less than month and you could imagine my excitement because I could see dinner dates, mani/pedis and of course SHOPPING trips in my future.... Well the jokes on me because neither one like to shop :( Even though I'm a little bummed about that, I'll survive because seeing my 2 awesome brother-in-laws happily married to the women they love makes up for all the Black Friday fun THEY will miss out on in my future!! As my mother-in-laws small family of 5 kids...4 grown and 1 perfect princess, Miss Fraser, grew into 9...I realized too that family isn't always blood...sometimes family is a bunch of strangers thrown into this big pot with a huge label on it called "Luther" I'm excited to see this new family grow and I'm ready for all the memory making that is in store for us!!! And to my brother-in-laws I say "you did good!" And to my new sister-in-laws...welcome to this crazy family and I love y'all ladies!

Snuggles to Spit Up

From that first moment that I saw "Pregnant" pop up on the test, I knew my life would change forever but MAN I had no idea what change meant at the time!!! After an amazingly perfect pregnancy I arrived at the hospital around 6:30am on August 16th to induce my labor. After 45 minutes of pushing, we welcomed our beautiful and healthy baby girl, Fraser Dowey Luther, into the world. The first night home was a doozy to say the least but we got the hang of parenting pretty quick :) In less than 24 hours, our family grew by 2 feet and in that moment I realized that I wasn't living for me anymore, my entire life was dedicated that that little girl forever. Now...when we go to eat, shopping or to the grocery store we load up a diaper bag with 2 bottles to be safe, paci wipes and an extra change of clothes. We make sure to crank the car so it's cooled or heated, get a blanket and load up our princess. I used to ride in the front and now, I've switched places with our bulldog so I can ride beside my daughter's car seat. I always knew babies changed your life but I guess I never really grasped how many minute daily routines that now revolve around a baby...and at times it is beyond frustrating...packing like you're going on vacation, running late because she woke up fussy and looking like a mess bc you forgot to apply makeup before you left, but when you see your beautiful baby's smile looking up at you with such love and wonder...I simply say "welcome chaos" being a mommy is worth all the lateness, spit up and constant gas from both ends :) I have came to a new understanding of routine. My new definition of the word: the small daily habits that used to be of the non important variety now become those moments that make you stand in amazement at the wonder, love and pure simplicity that is all wrapped up in a tiny human with her daddy's smile and mommy's eyes. Change never felt so good :) I thank God for allowing me to become a mom so that I can indulge in these small moments that take my breath away and make me laugh and tear up at the same time!